What Would I Unmake?

I'm a bit of an afternoon cloud today

I read an interesting blog today about deciding which game to unmake, and I thought that I'd expand the question to beyond just a game.

Happy Days (TV Show)
As a card-carrying Milwaukeean, I was forced to watch as a child. The damage done was irreversible. I still spell kool with a k for God's sake.

Mosquito (Animal)
The only animal I feel no remorse in killing.

Jimmy Carter (Politician)
I blame him for just about everything and encourage my children to feel revulsion even at an image of him. Bill Clinton gets an honorable mention.

Miami Dolphins (Sports Franchise)
That queer logo with a dolphin wearing a helmet is the most aggravating visual experience for me every fall.

The Perils of Gwendolyn and The Gods Must Be Crazy (tie - Film)
I firmly believe we can trace the root cause of the current U.S. recession back to these two films.

Microsoft Access (Database)
Where's the fine for Microsoft from the Euro-Thought-Police on this abomination?

Lifetime (TV Network)
This 24 hour groin-kick has somehow cloned itself into several flavors on my TV guide. I say cloned, because there couldn't have possibly been a male gamete involved.

Kanye West (Celebrity)
Only vaguely familiar with his music, I saw his picture the other day, and he looked like a straight-up buster.

Alzheimer's (Disease)
Anything that causes dementia and doesn't have the decency to kill you quickly is out in my book.

John Wayne (Actor)
Everything he was ever in sucked.

Dan Rather (Newsman)
Willing to take any risk because he's never ever wrong, no matter how much of it he has to make up.

Sanka, Folgers, Maxwell House, et al. (Hot Beverage)
Because these cheap-o mainstream mass brands of coffee taste worse than sphincter-o-the-day.

Budweiser (Cold Beverage)
This rice-bound formaldehyde blend of piss should be removed from the market.

Tic-tac-toe (Game)
The most pointless waste of time ever conceived. Didn't the inventor see War Games with Mathew Broderick?

MySpace (Social Network)
It is indescribable how bug-laden, spam-ridden and drivel-oriented this web space is to me. However, I don't have many friends so please invite me to be your friend.

I could go on and on, life is so dreary today.

Is My Blog Me Or Am I My Blog?

What is the correlation between shame and narcissism?

I like to think of myself as a generally smart guy even when it comes to how-the-Internet-works sorts of things. That was, until I started this blog. Through blogging I have this friend that exposes my profound lack of knowledge of Internet jargon. He's always saying things like OMGWTFBBQ! which makes me feel old and too tired to be anywhere near the BlogoSphere.

So I'm not feeling smart today, and I try to stoke the flame of narcissism by seeing who is linking to my blog. It just so happens I'm the 640 millionth InterWebian™ that's learned I can do this through Technorati. I see a few of the usual suspects (see friend-o-jargon above) and one completely unexpected blog, The Intent of Content, that has my blog gloriously exalted under My Online Addictions. So I take a read, all sorts of deep well-written thoughts on gaming intricacies right up my alley. My narcissistic heartbeat is aflutter...OMGWTFBBQ!

Then the shame sets in, wondering why I give a shit about some stranger who is addicted to my blog. What is wrong with me that this matters? I tell my kids to consider the source when they are complimented or insulted so they don't get a big head or suffer pointlessly by evaluating others' relevance. Why am I ignoring my own advice? Then I take my advice (which tastes like one of the yucky vitamins - I need to remember that).

Back to my well-worn ass-groove on the couch-of-indifference-and-apathy I return, satisfied that I'm tuned into the BlogoSphere just enough to stay young and making sure that I'm not buying a bit of it.

WWBD: What would Brett do?

I hope weird and unsettling things don't come in three...

I woke up this morning a Republican and had my voter registration card stamped Democrat before lunch. The last time I voted for a Democrat was in a 1988 primary in Wisconsin. As a freshly-minted citizen of age living in a suburb with Whitey all around me, I voted for Jesse Jackson and his dubious Rainbow Coalition in the primaries. Unable to stomach itty-bitty Dukakis in the general election, I read the lips of the looking-wiser-than-ever-lately (more on that in another post) George Bush.

Today I voted for Obama. I agree with his ever-present disdain for the everything that is wrong with the Clinton-machine and my America. My vote was not allegiance, more of a layaway payment on some swell boots. I'm giving him 8 months to convince me those boots are a necessity before I come to my Republican senses.

So, if I can survive a day getting stamped Democrat and saluting farewell to my favorite warrior - I guess I can take anything.

[2008-03-10 - Yet again weird things come in three. I learned later in the week that E. Gary Gygax died the day I posted this.]